Speaking Tips for Telling a Joke

Telling a joke is a performance.
Many people say:
‘I am just not very good at telling jokes!’
Well - I am not very good at ice hockey.
But then again, I have never learnt to skate and have not played much ‘hand-eye’ coordination sport, so it is probably not that surprising.
The attitude to telling jokes is similar to many people’s attitude to Public Speaking:
‘I am just not very good.’
I blame people like Barack Obama, who seem to talk as if it were completely natural.
I will not deny that some people may be more predisposed to speaking fluently, just as some people have much better hand-eye coordination than others, but there is much that can be learnt and practised.
Are you aiming to be the greatest Public Speaker in the world?  That might be a bit over-ambitious - or do you want to be a fluent, coherent, influential speaker - because that is something that all of us can achieve?
And much of the art of a well-told joke follows the same steps as effective Public Speaking.

When I was still working as a musician I remember being on tour with a full Big Band orchestra.
I was part of a small string section, affectionately known as the wall-paper, as our job during the evening was to provide a colourful tapestry of sound to some of the more lyrical songs, while it was the jazz players on the other side of the orchestra that did the real work, providing the energy, drive, and electricity to the performance.  (I also discovered that as well as being known as the wall-paper, we were also referred to on the other side of the orchestra as ‘f…ing tea drinkers’: as apparently we could not hold our own in a bar!.)

I remember a particular coach trip between two venues when one of the trumpeters started to tell a joke.  Within a few minutes, everyone was in hysterics.  Then a saxophonist came in with his story and then a trombonist and on it went for 2 and half hours, joke after joke.
I was in awe at their ability: not just brilliant musicians but also hilarious storytellers.
It did not occur to me immediately that having already mastered their instruments,
between gigs, they had plenty of dead time to practise their jokes.
As performing jazz musicians they had already overcome the main fear that most of us have in telling stories - of suddenly becoming self-conscious, being the centre of attention, and having to deliver something worth hearing.
In many ways the coach trip for them was another ‘musical set’, with each one taking their turn as soloist.

However being used to having eyes on you is only part of the skill-set of a good storyteller, most of the rest is timing.  An apt turn of phrase and striking punchlines don’t just happen:
just as speeches don’t just happen; they need to be planned, rehearsed and timed.

Most comedians will work through ta painful process of performing a new act in front of a few small, tame, invited audiences so that they can learn their timing, find out what works and drop or re-word lines they thought would be funny but don’t seem to get a reaction.
I heard an audition tape from a very well-known and much-loved comedian, from early in her career.
You could recognise the voice and the style, but it was painfully unfunny.
The delivery was unconvincing and the timing was not there.
In her case, it would take time and practice to hone her successful style.
Time, repetition, and conviction take commitment.
Happily, most of us do not want to be stand-up comedians, but most of us could benefit from being able to lighten the mood of a speech with an entertaining anecdote.

Charlie Jones used to say that humour connects with emotions and makes the message in the presentation go down deeper:
never forgetting that a comedian’s prime job is to entertain,
while a speaker’s prime job is to deliver a message.
So let’s look at how to successfully tell a humorous anecdote as part of a speech

10 tips for telling a joke

1. Taste

I am not just talking about off-colour jokes.  We need to be sure that in search of a laugh, we do not create an image that is either offensive of just distasteful.  Probably more people end up in a work tribunal for an off-colour remark that did not land properly than for any other reason and if you ever find yourself saying:
‘…but I was only joking.’
it is already way too late!
Therefore ask yourself; ‘Is the language or the imagery likely to offend?

2. Relevant

I remember hearing a BBC sports host invited to speak at an event, ostensibly to share his perspective on his career.  All he did was reel off a series of generic jokes.  Some were quite funny, but they left the audience with a sense of:
’What was the point of that?’
Trying to be funny for its own sake puts enormous pressure on the speaker, as their success stands or falls on how the joke is received.
However, if they find a humorous anecdote that supports their key message, they lessen that pressure, because if no one laughs, there is still a point to the story.
Then, typically, because there is less pressure on the speaker and therefore on the audience, the speaker is more likely to deliver their anecdote well and the audience is more likely to respond positively.
And so this is a challenge not just to sports presenters, but to all folk delivering a best man’s speech.
Don’t try to be funny: try to be relevant.

3. Ethos

What does your joke say about you?
If I start my presentation with a joke about my wife, am I likely to lose all the women in the room before I have even started?
This is particularly true if the audience does not know you or is still to make up their mind about you.
As a mature male, even a passing flippant comment about my wife might contribute to an image of a person who is a bit old-fashioned and sexist in their perspective.
I remember a speaker whose speech was focused on honesty and integrity deciding to open his presentation with a flippant comment about stealing towels from a hotel room.
Funny? – Yes!
What does that imply about his character?
For the sake of a quick laugh, he had created an image of a person who is neither honest nor has integrity.

4. Positive

Most jokes have a victim and there is a good chance that someone in the audience might identify with that victim.  As speakers we want to deliver messages that are mainly positive, optimistic, and motivating, therefore our stories need to reflect that.  Demonising a group or an individual might make us look mean and petty and unless our aim is to drive people off our land with a pitch-fork, we will fail one of the important tests of a good speaker – having a ‘pleasing personality’.

5. You can be the butt

The safest humour is about yourself and if choose a negative story, it is because you are using yourself as an example of what not to do or how not to behave. 
Therefore the message to your audience is still positive:
‘Don’t be like me!’
Making yourself the butt of your joke will also dispel any suggestion of arrogance or superiority that might arise simply by you standing on stage and feeling entitled to speak to people.
People like people who can laugh at themselves.

6. Be confident

Here is a ‘fake it until you make it’ if ever there was one.
It is always interesting on comedy panel shows, where a comedian needs the courage to command attention.  There are some comedians, who because of their reputation and experience seem to be able to break into the conversation and deliver their observation, while others, particularly if they are new to the format, seem to lack the same conviction, and their interjections come across as forced and needy.
Hopefully, when you are the person speaking, you are not in competition with others on the stage.  You are the speaker and so rather than having to break your way in to win attention, you merely need the confidence to start your story.

7. First line

This is true of any presentation.  How are you going to start?
The opening words are the moment when you are at your most insecure and the moment when your audience will make an instant decision on whether you are worth listening to or not.
I particularly remember one member of the band on the coach trip.
You could hear him whenever he wanted to break in to tell the next story.
He would jump in by commenting on the previous joke:
‘Brilliant.’ ‘I like that.’
He had now edged into the room and when he felt he had edged in far enough he would launch into the first line of his joke;
‘…Two blokes queuing up outside a bar….’
Once again we will not need to edge into the room if we are already the speaker and the opening line does not always need to be something special, but we do need to be clear about what it is:
‘I remember…’
‘The other day…’
‘Two men…’
A good confident start will set you up well and make the audience feel you are worth listening to.

8. Is the audience ready for this?

This is not just about taste and relevance, it is also about context.
Are they expecting you to be funny?
Does the subject matter lead towards humour?
Are they expecting to laugh?
I remember being asked to comment on the radio about a politician who had tried to be funny at a conference and her joke met a wall of embarrassed silence.

The joke was not particularly funny or well delivered, but it failed mainly because it fell short in all of those three contexts:
- She was a politician, not a comedian and so her trying to be funny was not expected
- The context was about politics and policy so it was not set up for humour
- The audience was not expecting to be entertained, they were there to be educated.
This does not mean that all of those obstacles could not have been overcome, but the speaker would need to prepare the joke carefully.
In contrast, think of some comedians who just need to say ‘Hello’ and everyone laughs because
- the speaker is a comedian and is expected to be funny
- the context is humorous
- the audience have come to be entertained.

9. Punchline

The beginning and the end of a speech are the two most significant moments and require the most attention and so it is with funny stories.  The last line needs to sit well and needs to be prepared, finessed, and delivered well.
In her younger days my wife (telling a story about your wife – be careful!) used to start telling a joke that she had heard, would laugh all the way through because she knew roughly what was coming and then forget the exact punchline.
She is not alone.  Many people try to repeat a joke they have just heard and get confused in the telling,
and therefore conclude:
‘I am just not very good at telling jokes!’
Therefore…

10. Practise

Jazz musicians playing riffs, footballers taking penalties, or speakers preparing speeches – all need to prepare.
Anything that looks or sounds easy usually takes a lot of practice, so if you have a good story that reinforces one of your points and it has a funny element to it, it is worth practising.  That does not mean learning by heart, it probably means repeating it many times to yourself or to others until it flows; focusing on the key lines that need to be delivered well, particularly the line that sets up the joke and the punchline that delivers the message.
Not everyone is naturally funny, but everyone can make a point that is backed up by a humorous example.