Public Speaking Tips for projecting Confidence
Sometimes confidence feels like something everyone else has except you.
We can conclude, therefore, that confidence is more about seeming than feeling.
When working with a group of young speakers, I would remind them of the typical TV talent show where an artist would perform supremely, and then in the interview afterwards, they would confess how nervous they were.
Everyone knows that Public Speaking is nerve-wracking.
Even so, when we see an anxious speaker, although we intellectually know they are naturally nervous and that in their position we would be as well, we can still find ourselves drifting very quickly into assuming they are nervous because they are unsure or unconvinced about their argument.
I am not keen on the ‘Fake it until you make it’ adage, as presenting yourself well should be grounded more in learning to trust in yourself and accessing the best version of you, and less in putting up a front and pretending to be something you are not.
Being an effective speaker will always be connected to openness and trustworthiness, and so ‘faking’ may be taking you down the wrong road.
In the end, we cannot convince an audience if we are unconvincing ourselves, so it is important to ‘seem’ confident, even if we don’t ‘feel’ it, because initially an audience will respond more to what you look like than what you say.
10 tips for ‘seeming’ confident
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Clear Purpose
A comedian teaching stand-up to a group of students highlighted three ingredients for a successful stand-up routine:
(i) Speak about something you know
(ii) Relate it to your audience
(iii) Have one theme or message
It is interesting that even in stand-up there is an emphasis on having a clear purpose to the act.
Some comedians are happy to deliver a string of jokes and one-liners, and often the impression they make evaporates as soon as they have finished their act. Others have a theme or a message that resonates and, in the best case, can make us think deeply about the world around us.
Take 90 seconds to look at James Acaster’s analysis of Brexit
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DENLFFgTTVI
Funny, perceptive, visual, and memorable – what more can one do to make a lasting point?
On a much less comedic level, Greta Thunberg is a clear example of someone who has such a clear purpose that her conviction overpowers any nervousness she might be feeling.
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Set Boundaries
If I chose to answer questions on TV‘s Mastermind, I would not be very confident about success in the General Knowledge section, but if I had a Specialist Subject and I immersed myself in that subject, I could develop a lot of confidence in that area. Choosing Twentieth Century history as a specialist subject would be much wider ranging than choosing the life of one particular person!
So the clearer the message and the more precise the area we want to cover in our talk, the more in control we will have and therefore the more confident we will feel in our ability to handle the subject.
This is particularly important if you are fairly new to a subject at work. Colleagues might start asking questions about it and you may not have the necessary knowledge to answer properly.
However if you let them know from the beginning that you intend to focus on one particular area of the subject, having set those boundaries the audience will know that a wider ranging question is beyond the scope of the discussion and now, rather than you looking foolish for not knowing the answer, they will look foolish for asking the question!
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Prepare
There is a simple recurring theme in these first three tips: know your stuff.
Many times, I have someone say to me:
‘I am OK with Public Speaking, but I struggle if I do not know what I am talking about.’
Why would you ever want to be standing up in front of people if you did not know what you were talking about?
I feel sometimes people regard Pubic Speaking as a skill that exists away from a subject
If you are speaking as an expert on the subject, there may be some research you need to do.
If you are sharing your experiences, then the knowledge is already there within you, but you will still need to organise and structure your thoughts.
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It is not about You
This is still one of the most useful pieces of advice I have been given.
IF confidence is rooted in how you feel about yourself, then most of us will struggle in front of a group of people, but if the confidence is rooted in how well you have prepared your subject, that is something over which we have more control.
And then if we put the focus on our audience it is not about us at all; it is all about getting the message across. I imagine that when Greta Thunberg speaks, she is not thinking about herself; she is thinking about the planet.
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Small steps
Similarly to setting boundaries (Tip #2), you cannot master a vast subject over-night, but you can take small steps. When I was helping trainers to deliver Public Speaking sessions to school children, I would not throw them in at the deep end with a complete programme to master, I would give them a small segment of the day to deliver and make sure that they were fully in control of that material. If it went well we would add more.
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The Opening
You cannot win a sports competition in the first few moments, but you can certainly lose one.
You may not be rejected at a presentation if you start poorly, but it might be hard to recover from the loss of confidence.
One good way of handling nerves at the beginning of a presentation (which is when nerves will be at their strongest) is to focus some extra attention on the opening sentences.
I have something that feels like an ‘out of body experience’ sometimes when I start to speak – I seem to be looking down on myself while talking – if I start well, it is easy to ‘get back inside the body’ and continue: if I start poorly, I want to run away!
So make sure you have done everything to guarantee a good start, as that will do miracles for your confidence.
Know your first words!
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Stance
You need to look confident to feel confident, so stand solidly.
Find your spot.
Shoulders over feet.
Give yourself a moment to feel grounded.
Taking that extra moment will help you gather yourself, but it also sends a very powerful message to the room: I am not hurried, I am not rushed, I start when I am ready.
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Eye contact
Face your fear! To be able to look at your audience will also send a message of confidence.
One of my tips for starting off (after getting in contact with the floor with a good stance) is to look at the audience members on the outside edges of the group. Doing this will also send out a message of confidence; it tells the room that you are able to gather the whole audience in the scope of your vision; that you are not ‘frightened’ to look at them.
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Vocal pace and projection
Nervous people usually speak fast; a slower pace usually expresses greater confidence.
A slower pace also has the benefit of giving the speaker more time to think, more time to modulate, and more space to emphasise key words.
It is worth recording a part of your presentation and then listening back for pace.
Usually we speak too fast. What works in a one-to-one conversation can sound rushed in a larger room, so it is important to slow the pace and to speak clearly.
Another mark of an unsure speaker would be a voice that is too small for the room.
Therefore, project to the far corners of the room:
Actually imagine our voice reaching beyond the last row of speakers and reaching into the corners.
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Practice
What else would I say?
Once we have identified the insubstantial and irrational fears (self-image, lack of self-belief) we need to identify the physical and practical things we can attend to (most of them covered above) and then practise.
This will be different for each of us.
Here is an article specifically on how to approach practice
https://www.ataps.co.uk/about/blog/public-speaking-tips-for-practise.html
It might require spending time by yourself and talking through the presentation regularly until it feels comfortable.
It might require a few tame and friendly people to allow you to run the presentation past them;
it might require a regular pep-talk from yourself or from someone whose opinion you value.
or if we are looking on a larger scale, it might be worth working out a complete programme of self-development – joining a Speakers Club, taking on small speaking tasks, and building up.
The only point here is that nothing gets better without practice
